In Life, We Will Have Trouble

Especially when we’re trimming the dog’s nails.

Our dog’s history is unclear to us as far as nail-trimming—yet one thing seems certain. At some point, she decided that she did not like it. Jack Russells have personality enough to begin with, but when they decide they don’t like something, they will have none of it, no matter how loyal they are to you.

In our case, we tried trimming nails in the bathtub, which made it harder for Chloe to roll and thus kept her from getting as many nips in. I spent afternoons petting her and sneaking in a clip now and then, trying hard not to appear nervous, which makes the dog nervous, and of course she can sense you are nervous, and so she bites, and being bitten can’t help but make one more nervous.

But the other day I had just had enough. Not enough to be cruel, but enough to be able to say “In life, I will have trouble. This dog is never going to allow me to cut her nails without a fight.” Therefore, I donned heavy gloves, attached Chloe’s leash to her collar, and with love and firmness and no room for question hauled her up by her neck for a moment at a time to trim her nails. It took about half an hour and I got away with only a couple major scratches, two bruises, and one bite that went straight through my pinkie nail.

I held onto patience and took deep breaths when she gnawed on my hands and yanked her up when there was no other help for it. I did cut too close on one nail, and blood spurted all over the carpet, after which I calmly tied the dog outside and got a cold, wet rag to sop up the mess before the carpet was stained, carrying on the rest of the endeavor outside.

After the fiasco I vacuumed the crumbs and allowed Chloe and myself a break from each other, after which she stayed even closer to my side and begged to be petted. It’s as if she knows she can’t help herself.

Life can’t help itself, either. In life, we will have trouble, and I think I’ve spent most of my time here trying to avoid it. But the other day while I was cutting Chloe’s nails I leaped into the trouble and throttled it. I remembered how I had worked with my hands many times on the farm as a child and endured worse injuries than I had with this one difficult hound. I forgot my fear of being bitten and let my fingers (albeit sheathed) be chewed. And I thought, “This is life. Que sera, sera.” (Whatever will be, will be.)

How many times have I longed for a certain peaceful perfection and in the doing so missed the chaos that was more meaningful? How many times have I driven myself nearly to madness in longing for order when I could have napped peacefully in the disorder and the world (and those around me) would have been better for it. Life IS chaos. If I want to get around it, I had better pray for death.

I don’t fear death, but I don’t want to die just yet. And while I’m living, I want to live fully, leaping into unavoidable trouble, not recklessly, but with the abandon that says, “Teach me. I’m ready to learn.” May it be so whether I am trimming the dog’s nails, weathering a spousal disagreement, dealing with loss or disappointment or simple daily chores.

In life, we will have trouble. When trouble finds me, may I welcome it and be the better, the richer, the freer, the more alive because of it. And may I find conversely that trouble is life, and find joy even there—perhaps especially there—for I have not experienced as many “perfect” memorable moments as I have truly life-changing moments of imperfection.

May you find the same, and cherish them!